Sunday Lunch Date

What a long weekend it has been. Bachelor part on wed, rehersal dinner on thursday, wedding friday, and then just pong with friends last night. I'm going to wait till tomorrow (like always) to reflect on this weekends events, but in the mean time I have a huge thing weighing on my mind...

Last week i mentioned that I had a plan to "keep the fire going" with Jesse. Well, I never really had an opportunity to put this plan in place, but then again, I never really tried that hard. Rejection is a hard thing for me to face, as i'm sure it is for everyone, so I'm having a slight fear of throwing myself out there with this plan, because I just don't want to hear that two letter word that starts with N. Speaking of that fear, I was recently texting and ex asking if she wanted to hang out. Not as a date, i just had an extra ticket to the baseball game and couldn't find anyone to go with me, so I was just going down a list. Well, she couldn't go but said that we should go to dinner sometime soon. So of course I agreed.

Here is a quick run down of my past with this girl. Met her at a restaurant. Things started really casual and only texted every once in awhile. Hung out one time and things just caught fire. Hungout regularly for about 3 months when her dad was diagnosed with cancer. Also, she was moving to West Virgina for school in August. So in an effort to spend as much time with her dad, the family, and her friends before she left, things with me were the last thing on her mind. She moved back to CO earlier this year. And now here we are.

Well, we never decided on a dinner, but while drunk texting my entire address book on firday night, I secured a lunch date for earlier today. Now i always hear of people who seperate but then see each other again and "never skip a beat". What does that mean exactly?? Lunch for me today was just ok. Rach looked great, but I just didn't know what to think of what was going on. Was this a date? Like and actual date? or nothing more than a friend date? How do you know without asking? But if i ask, and it really wasn't a date, then will things be weird? So many questions!!

Lunch only last a little over an hour and when I dropped Rach off back home, we hugged and she told me to text her when I got home. Of course I did, and I told her it was good to see her. She text back with, "It was great to see you." But never mentioned that we should do it again, or anything like that. So i'm thinking that it was probably just "ok" for her too, whether this was a date or just a friends date. I'm gonna try and not think about it much, but just keep things the way they started with us in the very beginning... casually texting.

Untill tomorrow... Night ya'll.